The morning was odd and slow with a slight aftermath because I woke up late.
The morning was empty without caffeine and in the afternoon I got visited. It went better than usual. normally i come out of it feeling shit...

However the decission is taken and I am abiding by it. What else can I do the benefits do not really match the heart burn incurred in the past few months.

I guess I'll just have to live on for a bit and then well see how it goes.

Mood: good the week-end has landed...

The day has been quite productive I have to admit. The happiness hasn't faded out as it normally does. Wonder how I will feel tomorrow. Providing I rest and have a relaxed evening everything should be ok...

Sent another couple of CV's today.

Mood: good but tired. I don't know If I'll still be inspired tomorrow.

Its funny... I saw Farenheit 9/11 yesterday... the weather is discuting today as well but inside I feel fine. It looks like I had enough moaning and I want to get on with it. Enough excuses and put up with whatever comes my way.

Its all very weird as to wy now... All of a sudden I have accepted my fate and I am just willing to put up with it to the max. I thank my girlfriend that surelly has a lot to do with this.

Mood: Good. Very good

As the applications pile up I realised how frasseld my brain is... we shall see what goes on... I just tired of this shit.

A door close yesterday. A door that draws me away from my current geographical location. So be it... I am a person of the bag... and who knows... I will land on more auspitable lands.

The problem is the heart burn associated with all this.... it will take a qhile to regain the confidence lost. We shall see... We shall seee.

Otherwise things have been going fine... reconciliation is among the best things ever. I guess we still have to talk things over but it should be nice to give us both a chance... Talking to my girlfriend in my own mind of course.

Mood: good but get to work you sad geezaar...

Nicolas is back among us in the cyberspace after a few days in and out of hospital....

Me alegro que estes bien.

The week-end started with an absolute nightmare... I ofended my girlfriend and she walked out on me...

We both have strong characters and when something pisses us off that is it.. it blows in all possible directions. I saw her today and we spoke again that is all good. I just need her to spend more time with me and all will be fine...

I care for her and I was really distrought to have her cry and leave me like that.

Otherwise the week-end was spent trying to forget the absolute loneliness that she had left behind. Football on sunday and more beer on satruday than I ever thought was the highlight of it.

My life is a chaos. But its out of there that I extract my creativity constance nullifies my-self and I can no longuer think straight... or bent should I say.

Mood: things are better ....